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Home » Articles » Ask the Babe
A reader asks: should I disclose my illness during a job interview?
Editrix's Note: Ask the Babe is written by members of our Babe Advisory Board, who field questions according to their experience. The Babe Advisory Board is made up of real women with real experiences as ChronicBabes - not medical experts. But today we have a special treat: Rosalind Joffe of CICoach.com is here to answer a career-related question.
A reader asks:
I recently had a very disturbing job-related thing happen, and it made me wonder about disclosure and other job interview issues. I hope you can offer some insight.
The scenario:
I sent in my cover letter and resume (which rock, if I do say so myself) to a children's museum, for a part-time position for which I was completely and perfectly qualified. The woman who received my resume left a totally excited message on my voicemail. And I was sure I could work it out even with the health stuff. We spoke on the phone first and she was raving about my background and then she asked, very pointedly, why I wanted part-time... da-da-da-DUM.
(Background: the most limiting of my current diagnoses are fibromyalgia, cervical spondylosis, and endometriosis, which together yield chronic aches and pains as well as two-week flares surrounding pre- and post-menses, including intermittent acute abdominal and lower back pains as well as fatigue/muscle weakness. My pain is generally controlled with pills and alternative methods.)
The disclosure:
I played it down, but I was basically honest and said that I had some chronic health stuff and was lucky that my husband was employed and I could take it a little easy. She got all weird and pushed to know what I "had" so I told her "arthritis in my neck." Although not the full story, it is true, and (I thought) benign enough not to elicit too much of a reaction. Au contraire, mon frere! She got so weird -- I would even say rude, saying "ARTHRITIS, at YOUR age?!?"
She then told me that she thought I should re-apply when I was "feeling better." Last I checked, arthritis doesn't go away! It made no logical sense. I replied, "Most likely, there won't be a problem - I'm sure that if we met we could explore it to see if the job would be possible." She totally squirmed out of it and that was that. I was so freaked out, not to mention sad, angry, and confused.
The aftermath:
I guess I felt like maybe she was right because it might be too physically demanding for me. Over the past year I've seriously reevaluated my strengths and limitations. Having volunteered at another children's museum, I decided that work in a children's museum would be a perfect alternative to working in a full-time early childhood classroom like I had done before (and perfect with my background, as the interviewer had even said), so I figured I'd better not burn my bridges!
I thought, I'll just try to volunteer there instead and make a niche for myself. I also felt like, what the hell can I do about this? I just moved to this city, I don't want drama, and anyway, I have to get used to these kinds of things, these kinds of inflexible people, and just let it go. But it's still totally lingering and I think I need to talk about it with someone who might have some personal experience, insight, and advice. It seems to me that it was my right to be seen and at least have some accommodations attempted...it might not even have been necessary! Plus there weren't even any physical requirements listed on the job description.
Is there anything I could have done differently to increase my chances for an interview? How would you suggest I handle situations like this in the future?
Rosalind Joffe of CICoach.com responds:
Let’s look at this from this point of view: What can you learn from this?
- When you’re applying for a job, complete honesty is good but disclosure is unnecessary. Say as much as you need to but no more than you have to. Why tell her about your physical or financial situation? It was inappropriate for her to get into this line of questioning so early. If it happens again, respond with, “Because it fits my needs at this time.” Honest but open-ended.
- Regard an interview as a two-way street. You are interviewing as well as being interviewed. This woman said several things that tells me that she wouldn’t be a good fit for you. Her inappropriate questions and comments helped you avoid a needless trip to an interview. What’s the likelihood you could have or would have wanted to work for her?
- Be clear about why you are applying for a job. An interviewer doesn’t have any real idea of your physical capabilities. It’s your responsibility to know why you want a job and whether you can do it so you can sell yourself properly. That’s often not clear from a job description and it takes an interview to learn enough to evaluate it.
Finally, keep trying. Interviewing takes time and you’re developing your skills as you do it, particularly around how to handle the issues that come up while living with a chronic illness.
P.S. - a disclaimer: We do our best to provide accurate information, but ChronicBabe.com is not meant as a substitute for professional medical care, diagnosis or treatment. Please consult your health care provider before embarking on any new treatment. Read our whole disclaimer here.
Posted: 5/9/2006 in Ask the Babe | Also posted in: Careers
